Saturday, January 16, 2010

Liberal Workshops

I was thinking that with the Liberal Party set to return to Ottawa "on schedule" January 25th, I am looking to propose some workshop and seminar ideas to pass the time. Such as arts and crafts with Ross Rebougliati, or picking winners with Gerard Kennedy. I already ran a poll (which closes in 11 hours) on which stunt you'd like to see Liberals attempt in order to pry attention away from our athletes. The runaway winner was Iggy and Rae chaining themselves to Parliament for a month, though my personal favourite was Iggy "jumping his caucus" on a motorcycle.

Here are some of my early ideas for Liberal Workshops; your feedback as always is encouraged:

1) Arts and Crafts with Ross Rebougliati

2) Hangover Remedies with John McCallum

3) How to Balance your Cheque Book with Bob Rae

4) Thesauruses Gone Wild with Mike Ignatieff

5) Exotic Interpretive Dancing with Ruby Dhalla

6) Job Interview Skills with Stephane Dion

7) Stock Market Tips with Scott Bryson

8) Anger Management with Ralph Goodale and guest speaker Bob Rae

9) Picking Winners with Gerard Kennedy

10) Spinning Red Yarn with Kady O'Malley

I will need to shave a few of these off the list if I am to do a webpoll. Or what I'll do is do a poll where you can select more than one option. I will set the poll so that you can "sign-up" for each Liberal seminar you'd like to attend.


  1. Media Relations with Garth Turner

    The Effective Use of Burning Crosses with Hedy Fry

    How to Spend $2 Billion without even trying - Alan Rock

    Off-shore Tax Havens in Bermuda with Paul Martin if we can find him.

    Analysis of Stephan Harper's Victory - But WE are ENTITLED to Govern - speaker to be announced.

    Getting all the Entitlements you are entitled to with a Liberal Senator to be named later.

  2. Being a Messiah with Justin Trudeau?

  3. Jedi Mind Tricks with Ujjal Dosangh

  4. Sex toys and diseases with Dr. Carolyn Bennett?

    The Art of Cross Burning with Hedy Fry?

  5. They could invite Howard Dean to Ottawa to host a seminar on Public Speaking With Enthusiasm...

  6. By the grace of Darwin could they invite Canadian Cynic to do a seminar on Emulating Jerry Springer? I always endeavour to be more like JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! in my every day life.

  7. How to be a Prop with Michael Ignatieff.

    How to be Dumber than Your Brother (for advanced dumb brothers) with David McGuinty.

    Going from Right to Wrong with Dr Keith Martin.

  8. Wrong Field of Dreams by Iggy and Kennedy

  9. Flip Flopping for Leaders with Iggy - Breakfast Seminar at the Waffle House on 3rd Street

    If We Can't Have Canada - Can We Still Hold Toronto?
    with Peggy Nash

    The Best French Wines - Wine Tasting with Iggy

    Hosted Bar with thanks to John McCallum - Bring the "Young Liberals"

    Gun Control - the not so secret agenda with Alan Rock, Special guest speaker Wendy Cukier

    How to Advance Your Enemies with Dennis Coddier

  10. Hmmm, there are a lot of strong contenders here. I may have to do this poll in tournament format...

  11. Building a better slush fund with John Chretien

    Michael Ignatieff, from coalition to bloodless coup in 10 I did it

    2 hour session of Whining with Wherry

  12. Half time entertainement:
    Martin and Chretien read out excerpts from their memoirs, in the same room,

  13. Mark Holland gives expert advice on Western Alienation and the Alberta Tarsands

    Martha Hall Finley on the fine art of saying nothing on talk shows,
    while using up all of your opponents time.
    (must have a willing host as participant)

  14. Joe Volpe on how to get your kids involved in politics

  15. Advanced Self-Defence Skills For The Modern Liberal: Techniques For Thrusting Your Knife into Your Opponent's Back.

  16. Discussion on advocating for death row inmates - moderated by Ujjal Dosanjh

    Louise M.

  17. Please note:
    Scott Reid will provide beer and popcorn for all seminars.
    John McCallum will provide for himself.

  18. 1.Spot the Looney (with: all of them)
    This was an old Monty Python skit. Some sort of game show.

    2.A pinata could be filled with bags of cash not yet returned to the Canadian tax payer as promised. MP's and senators will be blindfolded and will get to hit a suspended papier-mâché look alike of Harper using Inuit carvings.