Now that the Liberal party is suffering from extreme dementia and refuse to participate in drafting legislation, I need a little help from my friends. As it so happens one of my friends is a rank and file NDP member with a Master's Degree in Political Science. How they get away with calling politics a "science" is a debate for another day. Inspired by the recent performance of our new international music sensation Stephen Harper, I sat down and wrote a letter to my NDP to begin a non-binding peace negotiation between the NDP and the Tories. The Liberals have lost their minds, the Bloc has the ultimate goal of splitting the country, so I need to look at Jack Layton's NDP to get by.
Here is my opening letter to my NDP friend. Further correspondence on this matter will be posted at a later time.
My Open Letter to my NDP friend
Howdy Champ
Well I must confess, it has been far too long since we have been able to negotiate policy. We used to have some constructive conversations when sitting together in opposition, but since the Tories were elected to power, your party has been in blanket opposition of the man that I voted for to be Prime Minister. Moreover, your leader has ostensibly spoken of him as though he is some sort of primeval Darth Vader who wants to subvert democracy and steal from the poor. I'm not sure where we begin negotiations.
But here is our common problem. The Liberals have lost their minds. They have ceased to make any logical sense, they refuse to negotiate policy, and now they are desperately spewing nonsensical rhetoric in a vain attempt to get their feet on some sort of solid ground. They are suffering from some form of narcissistic dementia. I want parliament to work, you want parliament to work, so how do we make it work? I have a preliminary list of requirements and I look forward to your response and your list of requirements. Without further adieu, here is my list of concessions that I need from the NDP.
1) Tone down the Marxism. I am not saying abandon the mantra forever, I'm just asking that you as a party scale it back. Protectionism is not an appropriate response to an economic downturn. Marx was soundly against free trade, Smith encouraged international commerce.
2) The NDP needs to take a baby step towards the center. Prime Minister Harper, whether you like him or not, has taken a step to the left in order to govern. We have already made concessions to our principles, it is time that you step down from some of yours.
3) We do need some sensible limits on EI and welfare. It is nice to have a modest safety net, but you can't incentivize public assistance. It is called moral hazard, and it is destructive.
4) The world is cooling down. Forecast models predicted a direct linear relationship between CO2 and temperature, and while CO2 has continued to go up, temperature is now cooling down. Let's find renewable sources of energy, but you have to drop the anti-consumption mantra of Marx. We are all against pollution. Let's agree to disagree on the degree to which CO2 can be considered "pollution" and negotiate from there on the reduction of real pollution.
5) Sometimes what is best for the unions is not what is best for the country. Remember that.
6) Our justice system is already too soft on crime. You may need to step down from some of the extreme ACLU positions on the rights of criminals. I am pleased to say however, that many of those votes are not confidence matters.
This is what I can think of right now. This is a collective bargaining process, so I may add concessions in order to concede policy positions.
What say you?
Ahoy sir!
ReplyDeleteTo your points:
1. Marxism eh? Well, there are some people in the party that still believe in it. Most I venture don't believe in any fundamental ideology. I think that is the problem with the party. People just floating about in some kind of relatavisitc, post-modern world where they just vote for something that "feels good" at the moment but, under ANY scrutiny to a coherent argument, just falls apart. I'd actually prefer if the NDP believed in SOMETHING. Well, maybe not Marx - that didn't work out so well.
2. You are a political party because you want to show the electorate you can govern. Not that you can have an influence. Time for the NDP to grow up and reach out to the centre more often but in strategic, pragmatic ways.
3. I'd like to keep EI in the hands of provincial legislatures and not really talk about it at the federal level. I would suggest the federal NDP to do that.
4. NDP has to make peace within itself and climate change isn't going to do that. You have union members (loggers/miners) in the same tent as tree huggers. Time to start talking about the economic benefits of sustainable natural resource extraction. It might be best if both parties just don't talk about climate change period.
5. Ugh, sure. Whatever. I really don't see how the NDP will ever "agree" to this policy. Best just ignore it and focus on issues of agreement.
6. ACLU is an american lobby group. It is an interesting philosophical debate to see if a citizen has lost rights because of an infraction against the state. For example, can they vote? can they pay taxes? can they be killed by the state? All fascinating stuff in academia but in the real world, crime rates are dropping, the US is collapsing under its underpinnings of loss of rights of the individual as incarcerated so, I'd rather not repeat any of that up here.
Now, onto some things we can work on. Here are some suggested areas where neither party has killed the other on (or at least can agree with) in the short term.
1. Comprehensive Foreign Policy/Defence Policy review. Review will include Foreign Affairs, International Trade, Industry Canada, CIDA, National Defence. It might be wise for both parties to position this as, before we go spend money on the military and diplomats, Canada should have a clear understanding of what we want out of the world. Being strategic, deliberate will demonstrate to Canada both parties are not hotheads but sensible planners and governors of the public purse.
Points of agreement:
ReplyDelete1) EI in the hands of the provinces. The only complicating factor is that Layton has rallied his troops around EI and maximizing federal payments. How do you drop it from your platform when it has been your primary focus?
2) Compromise between industrial unionists and environmental activists under your tent is necessary. But that is a "you" problem, not a Tory problem.
3) The NDP needs to shift to the center if they are to grow their vote totals.
4) The unions employ economists who do preach Marxist ideals like protectionism and limiting consumption. I think Marx may even have been opposed to happiness.
Points of contention:
1) You want to negotiate foreign policy between the Tories and the NDP? Do you honestly believe that the "put a little love in your heart" crowd can agree with the "punch bad guys in the face" crowd on foreign policy?
2) Public sector unions. If you want to trim the fat from all branches of government, this is the first place I would start.
My friend has not responded to my response. Negotiations may have broken down between the Tories and the NDP. The good news is that it appears the Liberals are set to receive a dose of common sense, closing Layton's window of opportunity. Perhaps it was foolhardy to believe that the Conservatives could ever enter into pragmatic negotiations with Communists.
ReplyDelete