Do Not Buy Chiquita "Conflict Bananas"

When you buy a Chiquita banana, be warned, you might end up with blood on your hands. The fruit company boycotting our oil sands has a long history of bribery, violence, and corruption in Latin America to secure its banana monopoly. In recent years they have admitted to large monetary payments to terrorist organizations like FARC, who use violence in attempting to overthrow governments. Do you want to purchase and consume these blood bananas knowing that the money could find its way into the hands of paramilitary groups guilty of murder and kidnapping on an industrial scale? As Ezra Levant said "where do you think the term Banana Republic comes from?"

Ezra deserves most of the credit for discussing the violent history of this corrupt company, and for "blood bananas" trending on Twitter. All of this came to pass because Chiquita thinks our oil sands are unethical. Do they think the local environment will be better off if we leave the oil in the sand? Listen people, we have a serious problem. Thousands of acres of sand in Alberta are contaminated with oil. To me oil sands production is a massive clean up effort, not a precursor to doomsday. The oil companies deserve our praise for removing the oil from the sand. Plus I'm sure when workers strike for better working conditions, I doubt Suncor issues orders to open fire on their employees.

Party Subsidy Idea

After watching a heated exchange on the Soloman Show today, it is clear that the opposition parties are not prepared to part with their entitlements. The Conservatives plan to campaign on scrapping the per vote subsidy, so my idea is for the party to give their subsidy money to earthquake relief in Haiti. Donate it to this worthwhile tragedy, and challenge the other parties to do the same. You know the Liberals won't give up the money, as they still haven't paid off their 2006 leadership race (which Iggy lost). It would make for an interesting news story. I'd be interested to hear Tommy Mulcair attack the Tories on that one.

Would You Go To Mexico?

Today's poll question; would you consider taking a vacation in Mexico? Between the growing violence between drug cartels, kidnappings, and now exploding swamps, should that country remain one of Canada's top vacation destinations? Have never been, nor do I ever intend to. The only times in my life that I have left Canada was to visit the United States. Some day I would like to broaden my horizons, but I will likely be crossing the Atlantic before I cross the Rio Grande.

Brazil Elects Marxist Guerilla President

On Halloween Brazil elected a former Marxist guerrilla to become their new President. For a country that has been experiencing very rapid economic growth over the past 20 years, I would expect the good times to soon be at an end. I don't know if she has renounced Marxism, but earlier in her life she decided it prudent to become a militant communist. Once a Marxist, always a Marxist, right? If she decides to do to Brazil what Hugo Chavez has been doing to Venezuela, the end result is high unemployment and currency devaluation. Private enterprise gets strangled, and business stops investing in the economy.

And yes, I realize that the outgoing President was a wildly popular leftist who was not allowed by the constitution to run for another term. I suppose the left can claim some credit for the economic success that Brazil has enjoyed recently, but trust me, you can get too much of a "good thing"...

More Crisis In Haiti; Best Call Portugal

As a cholera epidemic is taking hold in Haiti and geologists are predicting another possible earthquake that could devastate the country, who ya gonna call? Punch Portugal into the speed dial, as this Security Council member is in a far better position to help the helpless. Isn't that why they beat us for the SC seat; their ability to respond quickly to international crisis? I'm sure the European Union trying to stack the Security Council with EU members had nothing to do with it, Portugal must just be better than us in global security matters.

I just hope that they are able to help the Haitian people. As members of the Security Council, I expect that they are able to do so.

Chilean President New Celebrity?

Sunday I watched footage of the President of Chile in England, where he seems to have attained rockstar status because it took over a month to evacuate trapped workers from an unsafe collapsed mine. The dude did an interview were he waxed on and off about how this month-plus rescue will make the world have greater respect for Chile. Seriously? The mine was unsafe, it took several weeks to get the people out, and you are parading yourself to the international media as a hero? That doesn't make any sense!

I am glad to see the workers have been rescued and it is great news, but that they required rescuing in the first place was a monumental blunder. The questions people should be asking him are what kind of safety standers should have been in place for Chilean mines but were not?

Venezuela Going Nuclear

On the list of the all-time bad ideas, Russia is going to help Hugo Chavez go nuclear. This story did not make headlines in the Canadian media, but the world must be concerned about a nut like Chavez getting a nuclear bomb. This is nearly as troubling as Iran going nuclear, except that Venezuela has not threatened to wipe any countries off the map...at least that I'm aware of. Hugo likes to conduct his warfare through a proxy FARC, and I think has a lower probability of using a bomb than does Arachnidinijad. Granted Iran conducts its crusade against Israel through its own proxy Hezbollah, but the distance between Tehran and Tel Aviv is much larger than the distance from Bogota and Caracas. If Iran deployed a bomb against Israel, at least Syria and Jordan would soak up most of the radiation.

I think Hugo is less likely to use a bomb, but if he gets one, he will give leverage and aggressive diplomacy a new name.


http://www.foxnews.com/world/2010/10/15/russian-vows-help-venezuela-build-nuclear-power-plant/

Cuban Communist Utopia: Up In Smoke

Today the government of Cuba announced that they will be cutting 10% of their government work force because "our state cannot and should not continue maintaining companies, productive entities, services and budgeted sectors with bloated payroll losses that hurt the economy". This cannot be a good day for Michael Moore or Hugo Chavez, who have long praised Cuba as a socialist utopia that should be a shinning example of heaven on earth for the rest of the world. Well guess what, communism doesn't work. I wonder how Fidel Castro feels about his brother's move towards free market capitalism? Raul took over from his brother in 2008, so it is unclear if Fidel approves of any of these reforms; which includes issuing more private business licenses, transfering more workers from the public sector to private sector, diminishing the state's roll in the Cuban economy.

“We have to erase forever the notion that Cuba is the only country in the world in which people can live without working” - Raul Castro

Meanwhile you have Hugo Chavez trying to turn Venezuela into Cuba, so this new Cuban revolution can only hurt his mojo. Will these reforms ripple throughout the socialists movements across Latin America, or will Raul Castro be vilified? Regardless, these have to be very somber revelations for communists and socialists everywhere. Michael Moore has to be crying in his Coco Puffs.

If you want to watch an interesting movie on the Cuban revolution, I recommend Lost City with Andy Garcia.

Pakistan Partisanship

This is insane. A Liberal MP has accused the Conservative government of ignoring the flood disaster in Pakistan because there aren't enough Pakistani votes in Canada to make it worth their while. The government's rapid response to the earthquake in Haiti however allegedly only happened because Stephen Harper wanted to pander to the Haitian votes in Montreal. Really? Haiti is an impoverished nation in our own backyard that can't take care of itself, while Pakistan is a nuclear power with a very large military on the other side of the planet. Are we going to send a military response team to a country that won't allow NATO boots to touch their soil?

There are an estimated 90,000 Haitians living in Montreal, a city where in 2008 the Tories only received 16% of the popular vote (easily their lowest total in any major Canadian city). If every single Haitian living in Montreal voted Conservative, they could bump their vote share to 19% and still win zero seats. Their best riding in the city is Mount Royal (27%), but the Tory candidate still finished 10,000 votes behind Irwin Cotler. Are there 10,000 Haitians living in that neighborhood? Saying that the government only responded quickly in Haiti to pander to a tiny fraction of voters in a city where they have almost no chance of winning even a single seat is insane!

Jim Karygiannis, give your head a shake! There are more people of Pakistani descent in Canada than Haitian. If disaster response were just about votes, it would make sense to cater to the larger population.

Rapper Wycleff Jean President of Haiti?

In one of the worst ideas that could possibly be conceived for earthquake torn Haiti, rumour has it that Haitian born rapper Wycleff Jean plans to run for President of the country. This is a terrible idea, and while he may do admirable charity work for his native country, he is absolutely not qualified for this position. Infact given the fragile state of the country, not only would this stall the recovery, it might actually set them back. Come to think of it, former Governor General of Canada Michaelle Jean would be an excellent choice if she were interested and at least she has head of state experience (defacto or otherwise).

If you want to know what would happen if Wycleff were elected President, watch the video:

The Two Escobars

Today I watched the ESPN "30 for 30" documentary "The Two Escobars” and it was absolutely fantastic. The doc discusses how the drug cartels started putting their money into Colombian soccer in the 1980s to launder money, led by the notorious Pablo Escobar. This climaxed at the 1994 World Cup when Colombia lost to the United States after an own goal by star player Andres Escobar, who was gunned down in the streets of Medellin upon returning to his native country. Shame of the incident prompted many fans and elite players to walk away from Colombian soccer, which was brought to prominence with the cocaine money from Pablo and collapsed after the own goal and subsequent execution of Andres...the Two Escobars.

This deserves some kind of award. The cartels gambled huge sums of money for Colombia to win, and after they lost to Romania in the first game of the 1994 World Cup, the death threats started coming in before the second game against the United States in an attempt to force victory. It was not successful.

Hugo Chavez Says The Darndest Things

Now that we have a politician running to become leader of Canada who likes to rip lines from Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez, perhaps we should pay a little more attention to some of his quotes. I'm talking about Hugo's quotes that we could very well here pop out of Ignatieff's mouth on his summer wheels off the bus tour. What Hugoism will Iggy Pop borrow next? Perhaps:

"Capitalism leads us straight to hell."

"I hereby accuse the North American empire of being the biggest menace to our planet." (last time I checked, Canada was part of North America)

"No part of the human community can live entirely on its own planet"

"Socialism builds and capitalism destroys."

"There is no turning back."

"Families go and begin to disguise their children as witches."

Smokey "The Barefoot" Bandit Captured

19 year old Colton Moore, also referred to as the Barefoot Bandit has been captured in the Bahamas after two years on the run. I first learned of the kid with the cult following when his picture was in the Vancouver Sun a year ago because he was believed to be operating in British Columbia at the time, breaking into homes and stealing airplanes. One of his biggest problems is that he knows how to fly a plane, he just can't land one. I wonder if going to flight school and saying "I don't need to know how to fly a plane, just how to land one" if that would raise red flags at homeland security?

While he will now have a little more time on his hands, he may want to consider writing a screenplay for a movie about his life. Granted it would be very similar to Catch Me If You Can with Tom and Leo, which diminishes the originality and thus the value of the project. They wouldn't be able to cast a better actor than DiCaprio, but with the cult following the kid has, it is what he should be looking to do. He must pay a penalty for his dozens of break, enter, and steal; and I would like to encourage him to find a career that does not involve crime. The world is a better place when we don't steal from one another, and when I see a plane in the sky, I'd like to know that the person flying it is trained to do so.

The Governor General's New Job

We will soon have a new Governor General in Canada, definitely before the next session of Parliament. I think that Michaelle Jean has been an excellent GG, and I would have supported her appointment to a second term. However she is now going to be the new United Nations Special envoy to Haiti, to help rebuild her native country after that terrible earthquake. I remember when Iggy demanded her term be extended, I don't think he thought to ask her if she would rather be Governor General, or a special envoy to rebuild Haiti. I suspect that she is very eager to begin her new job, where she can literally start saving the lives of people whose lives have been destroyed.

There will be a lot of anticipation building towards the announcement of a new GG, and I for one am excited to know who the appointment will be. I did some polling on this question in January, though I didn't include Rick Hansen who is considered to be one of the front runners for the job. Lewis MacKenzie defeated Preston Manning in that poll, where a lot of people believe that Presto is a serious candidate, assuming he even wants the job.


WHO WOULD YOU VOTE FOR THE NEXT GOVERNOR GENERAL?

Lewis MacKenzie (23%)
Rick Hillier (17%)
Preston Manning (16%)
Michaelle Jean (14%)
Deb Grey (12%)
Mike Harris (9%)
Ralph Klein (5%)

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/politics/jeans-g-g-tenure-marked-by-euphoria-and-controversy/article1614003/

Does Michaelle Jean even want a 2nd term?

With all the pundits speculating over whom her replacement will be and drawing inferences about why Michaelle Jean was not selected for a 2nd term; I would like to ask if the GG even wants to keep her current employment. It seems that everyone is assuming that the Governor General even wants to stay in Rideau Hall, when infact she may want to be named as a special envoy to Haiti. Our relief efforts will be continuing for at least a few more years, and our presence likely will be permanent in some capacity once the country has been rebuilt. I suspect that the GG would rather take on a diplomatic role to her home country than remain as the Queen's representative in Canada. Am I wrong?

For some insight into where this conversation began, I direct you to Tory Talk.

Prime Minister in Haiti

It was nice to see that while Ignatieff is enjoying his Olympic vacation, the Prime Minister is in Haiti speaking with their President about building a new Haitian government compound which would allow them to provide basic services to their population. It is about priorities. I would like to know exactly when Iggy acquired these Olympic tickets (given the bloviating he's been doing about the importance of our MPs being in Ottawa right now), but somehow I suspect that information would not be available in an Access to Information request.

With all the media focus on the Olympics, hopefully this story about Stephen Harper rebuilding the Haitian government is not lost. I don't expect Kady O'Malley to applaud the PMO for doing the right thing while Iggy is trolling for cheap photo ops. I would just like the Canadian people to know that their government is not on vacation like Iggy, they are actually out there on the ground trying to rebuild a fragile nation after a terrible disaster.

Jamaican Bobsled Team

"People you know they can't believe, Jamaica we have a bobsled team!"

- Cool Runnings.

One of my all-time favourite Olympic movies is Cool Runnings with John Candy. Although the team was a media darling at the Calgary Olympics, they have since faded into memory. You will all be pleased to know that the Jamaican bobsled team still exists, they have just failed to qualify for the last two Winter Olympics.

The logic is sound. Jamaica produces many of the world's fastest sprinters, and speed at the start is an enormous advantage in the sport of bobsled. In theory this is the one Winter Olympic sport that Jamaica should thrive at. John Candy was on to something, and yet despite 20+ years of trying they have yet to translate their speed advantage into Olympic success. While perhaps we cannot cheer for the Jamaican bobsled team at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics, we can still ask the question, what is your favourite Olympic themed movie of all time?

I voted for Cool Runnings, but I am also a big fan of the film Without Limits about Steve Prefontaine. There were two movies made around the same time about the same athlete, but the one starring Billy Crudup and Donald Sutherland was unquestionably the better of the two films.

Prorogation and Disaster Response

Here I was under the impression that prorogation meant vacation, and yet it seems as though all my Government Ministers were hard at work doing their jobs when this catastrophe hit. The Government was well prepared and were able to quickly deploy emergency responders, and that the mission is benefitting significantly from military hardware purchases by the same Defense Ministers who have been accused of criminal incompetence in recent months by a desperate opposition.

Government is working, but I guarantee you if the poll numbers start to swing back towards the Tories, the Liberals will attempt to make the case that the prorogation of Parliament somehow diminished our response time; though it is virtually impossible to see how we could have done it any faster. Soloman and Van Dussen in their "Power Panel" were trying to throw out some ideas on how this can hurt the Tories. It would appear that they have not yet devised a way to spin the Haiti disaster as a negative for the Government. But you know it will be coming, ESPECIALLY if the polls start to swing back.

Granted the situation is still active and yet to be resolved, but both Canada and the United States are further mobilizing their Armed Forces for a humanitarian peacekeeping mission. From what I have seen Canada should have nearly 1,000 boots on the ground next week, and Obama has ordered 10,000 for deployment. Hopefully political instability will not escalate such that the troops can focus on disaster response rather than combat operations.

What is probably coming next is a demand to reconvene parliament to deal with the issue, as though daily rounds of Question Period is a productive use of government time during a serious crisis. I know Soloman introduced the idea today that our presence in Afghanistan is jeopardizing our response-ability in Haiti.

Haiti Get Well Soon

I would like to extend my best wishes to every man, woman, and child on the ground in Haiti. I do not know enough about the logistics of this aid operation to recommend a best course of action, but having just watched an interview with Lawrence Cannon, I feel confident that the Canadian Government and international community are doing an exemplary job responding to the crisis thus far. Clearly saving lives is the overriding priority at this stage, and the best way to do that is with boots on the ground, a fleet of Caterpillars, food, water and eventually shelter. Regrettably given the political instability, the best way to deliver it to the most vulnerable is with troops with guns in their cities. Such is the case when you have marauding gangs wielding machetes roaming the streets. I know Liberals will shudder at the thought of Canadian troops in cities, but how many reserve forces do we have at our disposal right now? How many troops are required to pacify and relieve Port Au Prince? How many personnel are being offered from other countries? I don't know enough about the chess pieces to recommend an optimal course of action. From all indications the Canadian Government's response has been extraordinary.

There is a significant military presence around Vancouver test driving worst case scenarios, and I am assuming if we are required to divert a meaningful number of active duty personnel not already on deployment, we are going to be diverting them away from the Olympics. It is the moral choice to divert resources away from a possible disaster that may not happen to assist in a disaster that we know has happened. Canada is on Al Qaeda's "Hit List" because our boys and girls are killing them in Afghanistan, and we have been planning this little party in Vancouver for a few years now.

Let's do everything we can to help those Haitians in need, and be on the lookout for those cretins who exploit situations of public generosity for fraudulent personal gain. I'm not an expert in phony charities or the best way to track them down and shut them down, I just know that there are people out there shameless enough to do it. The sort of deplorable deed that makes you sit back and say to yourself; "I sure hope Hell exists." If you observe any suspicious profiteering, I would suggest reporting it to the RCMP for vetting.

I have also read some suggestions that Haiti be adopted as a defacto Province of Canada, and while I support a friendly relationship there is also a significant negative liability of extending the protection of our constitution over this politically unstable nation. I vote for a closer economic relationship, that our markets can remain open to whatever they make there and encourage investment in manufacturing infrastructure. Let's do our best to help them out when tragedy strikes and let's increase the number of refugees we will accept.

Nostradamus 2012

I dragged my ass out of bed for another lazy Sunday, turned on the History Channel, and what to my wondrous eyes should appear? A new documentary about Nostradamus, the ancient Mayans, and the year 2012. I was fascinated with the prophecies of Nostradamus when I was in high school, back when Nostradamian Scholars were predicting with unequivocal certainty that 2/3 of the world's population would die in July of 1999. That never happened, and I became a skeptic.

His prophecies are written in a vague form of poetry that can be filtered to fit virtually any significant historical event. He wrote vague predictions on pieces of paper, and for the rest of time historians would take these predictions and fit them to events that best suited their argument. Yet the probability that a man looked into a crystal ball 400 plus years ago and saw Kennedy being shot is virtually zero. Who am I kidding, it is exactly zero. The Zapruder Film was not pre-screened in 16th century France.

This documentary that I have been watching for the last 45 minutes ties Nostradamus into the Mayan calendar. The Mayans of course being among the first experts in astronomy and designed an elaborate calendar that has proven very accurate, and the calendar stops in Dec 2012. Coincidently, in Dec 2012 the sun, the earth, and the center of the Milky Way galaxy line up; an event that only happens about once every 26,000 years. I did score a B+ in Introductory Astronomy as a University freshman, so I do have a basic understanding of the key principles. I believe 95% of Astrology is bullshit. That you could say "you are going to meet a new person today because Aquarius and Jupiter are in zero". There is no direct correlation between where star constellations are in the sky and whether or not your boss will give you shit of Tuesday. Oh my Lord, that star is there and that star is there, I need to go bet on the Rams! That is just stupid.

In Astronomy, all the fundamentals are based on the observed rules of physics. We know that our planet is floating around a sun, and that our solar system is floating around the Milky Way. Our sun has a mighty gravitational pull which keeps our planet circling around at a fixed distance. At the center of our galaxy is a massive force of gravity strong enough to pull millions of stars into orbit. If our tiny little planet fell into a straight line with these two massive forces of gravity, it is possible that we could feel a measured effect on our planet, however small or however large that might be. Maybe it just adds 20 yards to my drive and we get minor satellite disruption, or maybe we feel no effect at all. While I am a mathematician, I am not qualified to predict the effects of this cosmic alignment.

Did the Mayans stop writing their calendar because the world was going to end? Or did they just get tired of carving it into stone? Do you think two masons just looked at each other one day and said "well we've gone up to 2000 years in the future, what do you say we call it quits and go shoot some ball?" The stars travel through the sky in a predictable geometric pattern. Once you isolate the algebraic formulas, you can say with absolute certainty the coordinates of all stars and planets at any moment in time in the past or future. If you would like to be able to map the stars in the sky in perpetuity, the software package you need to buy is Starry Night designed by a pair of University of Guelph Physicists (this would make a fantastic Christmas gift for amateur astronomers).

What has other academics concerned is that there does appear to be a confluence of events leading towards this rare solar gravitational alignment. The first being that global warming as introduced to us by Al Gore, that driving cars drives world temperature is bullshit. It was always the sun. Lots of solar activity, earth gets hot, low solar activity, earth cools. Solar cycles are indeed cyclical, and right now we are in a low cycle. Solar scientists predict that in 2012 we will be back into a high activity cycle. Does a peak in the solar cycle when matched with this rare gravitational alignment mean that the noticed effects on earth will be magnified? I suppose it is possible, however improbable. Who would have thought that world temperatures were affected by that great ball of fire in the sky, and not whether or not I take the bus to work?

Then you have Obama, Pelosi, and Frank setting global economic policy for the next few years. They will be desperate to rush through their agenda before next year's midterm elections, and they may place destructive restrictions on economic activity. The American withdrawal from Iraq while Iran is mobilizing for a showdown with Israel could destabilize the region. I fully expect Obama to pull American soldiers out of Mesopotamia by the end of his first term. The government of Pakistan seems increasingly vulnerable to radical Islam, and it is frightening to think what those nut jobs would do if they got their hands on the leadership of Pakistan and its military. So long as NATO has a 2nd front open against these revolutionaries, the probability of them sacking Islamabad is significantly diminished. NATO withdrawal from Afghanistan would remove a check and balance on a fundamentalist movement that endeavors to control the real prize in the Himalayan region, Pakistan.

Then you have the large declines in the bee populations, which we are dependent on to pollinate crops and wild plans, meaning that our food supply could be vulnerable. The collective works of Geldoff and Bono over the last 20 years have facilitated an unsustainably high population growth rate in the impoverished world; where populations have far and away outstretched their ability to feed themselves. If the grain transfers stop, all hell breaks loose. Bob and Sonny, the road to Hell is paved with good intentions...

Do I think that Armageddon is coming? No. It is possible, but I believe the smart bet is that in the end, modern civilization is extremely intelligent, adaptable, productive, and creative. I am a fan of man! I just wanted to take the opportunity to riff on Nostradamus and End of Days philosophy while the History Channel is hosting some kind of Nostradamus marathon.