I am now 24 hours into my hunger strike demanding that the government buy me a house. Let me clarify, I'm going to stop eating "solid foods", but everything else is still in play. Yes, I'm willing to die to get my free house, but I won't stop eating Dairy Queen. Consuming plenty of vitamins and calories does not guarantee that I will survive this ordeal, but when you see pictures of me a month into the protest and it doesn't look like I've lost any weight, trust that I'm still willing to die for my free house. This will allow other people to cry that I'm dying, when infact I could do this for several months.
Frankly it doesn't matter if the government has already spent millions of dollars on me; how that money was allocated is of no concern to the tax payers who funded it. Try to investigate, and I'll sue, maybe even block a highway. I should be a hero, not subject to an investigation that I stole bags of cash from the people I'm supposed to represent. Auditors should not be allowed to peak behind the curtain. I'm making a statement and trying to help all the people who deserve a free house. I will be their martyr, just pay no attention to the many calories that I'm consuming and the money I've stolen. That doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is free everything for everyone.